You know, I have done more than my fair share of dance parties in my time here at Chuck Norris Ate My Baby, and rarely have I found myself speechless due to a video. I can almost always drum up something snarky or semi-witty to say about whatever disaster-piece that crosses my path. Then along came Vortex, a Dutch metal band that came jumping from out of nowhere, studded leather and all, right into my life and my heart. Like I said, I'm speechless, so why don't I stop yapping and let the lords of metal take over this show…
I can probably just retire from throwing Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party and simply repost this video every week. I mean, where do I go from here? What's going to trump this one? Nothing. Nothing trumps a dude with fangs that's wearing a cape, a studded headband and who sings beautifully into a fucking tibia. Or at least I think that's a tibia, but you know, I ain't no doctor, so what do I know about anything that isn't hot beat related. This shit is like the metal equivalent of Jan Terri, only with slightly higher production values and better hair. It's incredible and also quite riveting, and I would like to thank Vortex for Opening the Gate in the name of metal, with metal. If they didn't do it, who would?
Man, am I feeling really down tonight…all the kids at school are nothing but yuppie jerk offs, and because of that dumb jock, Tim Hainy, I got chocolate milk all over my best maroon and white baseball tee. To make things worse, thanks to those idiot football losers, half the girls in the school almost saw my skin-flute and my full - and incredibly white - naked ass today. But the cherry on top of this shit sundae has got to be the greatest rock sta…no, scratch that, the greatest musician of all time, as well as my idol and object of affection, Sammi Curr, died in a fire today. Man, this sucks sooo bad! Sammi was the only person that understood me. He was the only one that could make all of this better.
There is one good thing that came out of today's many un-radical events, and thanks to my buddy, DJ Nuke, I now have in my possession the only existing copy of Sammi Curr's last recording. If anything can lift me out of this funk, it's the sounds of Sammi's voice. He understands where I'm coming from, he knows who I really am deep inside, and together, we can take down all of those stupid jocks. It's just you and me, Sammi, in my bedroom, all alone, and together we will rock this party all night long!! It's like you always said, Sammi…rock's chosen warriors will rule the apocalypse, so let's rock.
Trick or Treat is the title track for the 1986 horror-METAL!! classic (well, maybe not classic…), Trick or Treat. The entire soundtrack was performed by British heavy metal band, Fastway, who would later release the Trick or Treat OST as their fourth studio album. The music is decent for what it is, I mean, it's certainly dated, but it does capture a time in my life that I will always look back on fondly.
Trick or Treat is a shit fart of a film, but it's super fun and the level of entertainment that is reached with how bad it can be at times is what makes the movie a rewarding watch. However, I do enjoy Trick or Treat a little more than I should for how it does really bring me back to a time of being a rebellious youth who was constantly listening to Heavy METAL!! in my badass basement bedroom covered in Megadeth and Anthrax posters. This was a time when I would sit through 3 hours of The Ball waiting for a decent video. A time when I would pretend my GI Joe Cobra Raven was a guitar, a guitar I rocked like a motha fucka!!! I seriously did. Nevertheless, my love for METAL!! never resulted in me staring longingly at any male lead singer of any band. Well, maybe Lemmy, but he's like just so dreamy, how could I not?
For this week's edition of Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party, I had to travel through time to bring you all this hot little ditty from the past. Fresh off the meat rack, this dope track is going to bring you way back, to a time when shit was far from whack! And that time is 1985, and the song in question is Head Over Heels as featured in 2001's time travel cult classic, Donnie Darko.
Head Over Heels was performed by British pop rock band, Tears for Fears and written by band mates Curt Smith and Jon Cryer lookalike, Roland Orzabal. Originally released in 1985 on the album, Songs from the Big Chair, Head Over Heels was one of many major hits from the band in both their native country, as well as in the States. Anyone in my age range remembers the song and band quite well, but I think the song was slightly forgotten about until this notorious scene rolled across screens in Donnie Darko.
In what is one of my all time favorite scenes, Donnie Darko director Richard Kelly, wrote and choreographed the segment specifically with Head Over Heels in in mind. With only the music playing, the one continuous sequence introduces the vast inhabitants of Donnie Darko's world perfectly. In the span of two and a half minutes, you have a basic character introduction for a dozen or so characters, all executed in a natural and simplistic fashion. In that two and a half minutes, you know who is who, who they are, and how they fit into the world created by Kelly. Brilliant scene and one of the best of the last decade, in my opinion. And the song, well, the song is just fantastic to top things off, and no matter how great the scene is, it is Head Over Heels that really seals the deal.
WHOOOOO!! This party is off the meat rack, brah! And it isn't over just yet, we have one last round of hot beats to frighten you right out of your seats...and on to the dance floor! With the celebration getting close to being over, I should let some of you ladies know about the haunted house set up in the private suite...it's filled with bats and ghouls and trouser snakes, and I promise to protect you from all but one! What's that Skele-tone? Okay people, Skele-tone really out did himself and found this last minute doozy late last night while he was trying to find a ghoul-friend on Hott Buttz.com! You all ready for round three? Drop it, Skele-tone!
Soul Snatcher feat. Kfiz "Creepin' Tonight"
Wow, Skele-tone...seriously?! Talk about frightening! Those dudes were mad scury and next time someone steps to me, I'm using the line..."You looking like Skeletor, and your old lady already look like...Skele-whore!" Talk about tight rhymes! Alrighty, we got one final track that is the perfect way to end this epic dance party! I hope you all are having a wicked Halloween and while I would hate to see it all come to an end, it has been a blast for us over here at Chuck Norris Ate My Baby!
Whoa...ladies, ladies...we have a dress code here at the club, it's business casual. As in, it's my business to casually get into your pants! Had ya sweatin' there for a second...you know the only dress code at Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party!! is at some point tonight, each one of you has to wear me! YEOWOWOWAA! We have a sick party going on tonight, and an even sicker song to jam out to! The one the only, dj Skele-tone is in the mood for a little necking tonight - question is, out of all you fine ladies out there on da dance floor, who's it gonna be tonight?! It's Fright Night by The J Geils Band! Hey, Skele-tone...drop that beat son!
Aw jeez, tell me that isn't Steven Seagal...as if we already didn't have enough room to dance on a Friday night...sheesh.
Fright Night was performed by The J. Geils Band (?!) for the 1985 classic Vampire film of the very same name, Fright Night! I did not even know there was a video for this song until I was literally writing this post - I was planning on using a fan made one instead and I even was commenting on how I wish there was a video! Of course, the one on You Tube was Disabled By An Asshole, so I did some searching and found this video. And boy, am I glad I did! It is so in the running against the one and only, Big Trouble in Little China for best song and video at a dance party! First off, the cute little move they do while under the covers right at the beginning, shows how much fun they had making this video, and how much fun they had in bed together. I love the Peter Vincent quadruple take stake attack, and Geils has got to be wearing some Air Jordan's to be able to jump with such vertical height! Geils versus Bird perhaps? This video rocks!
Back to the task at hand though, which is to find a way for you three ladies and I to make out! HOWZZA-OOOH! I feel frisky! And if you don't believe me, I got the proof right here! Watch...I can carry all three of your purses at the same time!
What up daaawg?! First off, I would hate to lead you astray with the title of this post, as the song Bring Your Daughter to the Slaaaaaaaugh-ter! is in fact a song written for a Nightmare film. In fact, it was originally recorded and released by a solo Bruce Dickinson for A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child, but there was never a Nightmare themed video made for the song (bummer!), and as you will find out, the title of this post is more than fitting for our jammity jammy jam this fine Friday evening! And oh boy, this is the Friday to check out the hottest club in a 2 mile radius - Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party!!! Whoop whoooo! Tonight's Dance Part-tay marks the big comeback of the one - the only - the always bony...dj SKELE-TOOOOOONE! Ladies, ladies...please, keep your shirts on! I understand your excitement about Skele-tone's return, but save it for later! *cough*preferably when we're alone*cough* You know when dj Skele-tone is here, you will be shaking that tight little rear, and it looks to be no different dear, as he has brought with him a copy of Love Kills performed by glam gods, Vinnie Vincent Invasion!! Let's get this party started!
Oh great...who invited Ricky Rachtman?! There goes all our street cred!
Love Kills was released in 1988 by the Vinnie Vincent Invasion for their second album, All Systems Go, but more notably appeared on the soundtrack for A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master. Vinnie Vincent Invasion consisted of band founder and former Kiss guitarist, Vinnie Vincent with Dana Strum on bass, Bobby Rock on drums, and after a changing of the metal god guard, Mark Slaughter (get it now?!) belting the vocals. I am very familiar with almost every video presented here at Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party, but Love Kills has for whatever reason, completely escaped my knowledge - though, that could partially be due to the video never being featured on any of the DVD releases.
I do dig this solid little rock ballad and the video is great too, being filled with some clips from the film intertwined with the rock! Also, it appears that the band is performing in the same church where Alice and Freddy have there face off at the end of Dream Master, or more famously, the place where Freddy screamed "It's a boy!" in Dream Child. Outside of the Nightmare clips, I was extremely pumped when I saw the Headbangers Ball logo...but the star is truly the band. I love how the video starts, with Mark (that's what I call him) walking around slowly, elegantly even, with the wind flowing through his gorgeous hair…wind caused by the power of his magical voice! I really do hope you stuck it out to the end of the video - it would be a shame for you to miss the guitarist as he decides to shred whilst wearing a Freddy glove, where he then proceeds to do an "Oh stop it!" motion at the camera. It is truly menacing, yet sexy! Moreover, I did see a windmill guitar move that was not relevant to the music playing...at all, and that is exactly why it rules.
Okay, I have more than exceeded my time here tonight, so let's get back to the dancin' and romancin'! Ladies...now's the time to remove your shirts, cause I'm feeling a little frisky! And hopefully your feeling a little risky, as I am a breeding ground for STDs!! Hey...we're all about giving here at Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party!
