Showing posts with label Metal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Metal. Show all posts

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Rocktober Blood (1984): Death By Falsetto

Rocktober Blood

After going on a killing spree that resulted in the death of “25 rock and rollers,” musician Billy “Eye” Harper (Tray Loren) is sentenced to death. Two years later, Billy is back to take revenge on the sole survivor of his murder spree and key witness in his sentencing, Lynn (Donna Scoggins), just as she is about to go on tour with the remaining members of Billy’s old band. 

Directed by Beverly Sebastian (who also co-wrote with husband Ferd Sebastian), Rocktober Blood is completely driven by its time period. Wood paneling, random acts of aerobics, Jacuzzis, and hanging plants abound, Rocktober Blood is about as ‘80s as one film can possibly get, especially when you mix in a heavy dose of blissful falsetto. And it is this falsetto that really kicks the film off on the right foot, as right off the bat we are subjected to a recording studio performance by Billy, wherein he knocks out a batch of falsetto so intense, I needed a towel dry afterwards.  

Rocktober Blood (1984) movie review

The majority of Rocktober Blood focuses on Lynn as she prepares to kick off her band’s big Rocktober Blood tour, which consists of her taking baths, “taking Jacuzzis” and being stalked by Billy, who is seemingly back from the dead. These sporadic run-ins with Billy are a great concern for Lynn, but seeing as Billy was executed years earlier, everyone just assumes that she is simply cracking under pressure. Regardless of Lynn’s sanity, or lack thereof, someone is indeed messing with her, and whether or not it’s actually Billy or someone posing as Billy, people are getting killed along the way.

As a slasher film, Rocktober Blood hits a number of stereotypical slasher notes, albeit in an enjoyably silly fashion. There’s plenty of nudity, most of which is relegated to Scoggins, who is quite attractive despite her shockingly white ass. She certainly brings her tan line A-game. There’s some stalking, some obscene phone calls and a handful of decent kills, one of my personal favorites being a hot iron-to-the-throat, which apparently results in immediate death. Of course, what B-grade ‘80s heavy metal slasher flick would be complete without some insanely bad/amazing dialogue?! As shown in the following examples, Rocktober Blood most certainly delivers in this department:

Rocktober Blood (1984) movie review 1

Lynn: "We're are you going?”

Billy: “I got a hot date tonight.”

Lynn: “At 4:30 in the morning?”

Billy: “What can I say, she wants my bod.”

The Killer: "I want your hot, steamy pussy blood all over my face."

Lynn: “I think I am going to go take a Jacuzzi.”

Like, seriously, who takes a Jacuzzi? I take an aspirin. I take a shit, but I don’t “take” a Jacuzzi.

In any event, where Rocktober Blood flows strongest is in the musical performances that bookend the film. Unfortunately, however, outside of the incredible Billy “Eye” falsetto opening and the film’s finale, there aren’t many, if any, musical performances, which is a little unfortunate.Thankfully, the finale makes up for this by being the clear highlight of the film, in that it features a Grand Guignolesque stage performance where the killer – hidden beneath a mask – sings his heart out as he slays scantily-clad female stage performers. Naturally, considering the overall horror theme of the stage show, the audience and even the band members believe this to all be a part of the show, when in all reality people are actually being murdered on stage.

Rocktober Blood (1984) movie review 3

While lacking the qualities necessary in making what one would consider a good movie, Rocktober Blood is a thoroughly enjoyable entry into the heavy metal horror sub-genre and certainly a must see for anyone who enjoys a little ‘80s cheese. At the very least, the awesome Sorcery soundtrack should give you something to chew on for a few days, as that’s about how long the song “Rainbow Eyes” will be bouncing around in your head.

Friday, December 3, 2010

Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party!: You're A Bad Man, Charlie Brown Edition!

A Charlie Brown Christmas has been a staple of Christmastime joy and happiness since 1965 as well as a favorite of mine since I can remember. Now, while I truly love the music by the Vince Guaraldi Trio, I'll opt to take the Heavy Metal route with this dance party for no other reason than it's funny. The song used in this video is titled, Perfect Night For A Hanging (and what night isn't, honestly?), performed by the Christian (naturally) Metal band, Tourniquet.

Tourniquet is okay enough, I suppose…they've made a few decent thrash songs but overall, they're pretty corny (Christian Metal, remember?). Still, the joy to the world that is to be had with this pair up is as simple as watching the various Peanut characters singing the lyrics. It's just so hysterical that I cannot stop laughing! Okay, maybe it's not. Maybe it's only moderately funny and would be way better if it were a Black Metal band. Well, too late now…enjoy!    

 

Friday, November 5, 2010

Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party!: Dutch Oven Edition!

vortexopenthegate

You know, I have done more than my fair share of dance parties in my time here at Chuck Norris Ate My Baby, and rarely have I found myself speechless due to a video. I can almost always drum up something snarky or semi-witty to say about whatever disaster-piece that crosses my path. Then along came Vortex, a Dutch metal band that came jumping from out of nowhere, studded leather and all, right into my life and my heart. Like I said, I'm speechless, so why don't I stop yapping and let the lords of metal take over this show…  

 

I can probably just retire from throwing Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party and simply repost this video every week. I mean, where do I go from here? What's going to trump this one? Nothing. Nothing trumps a dude with fangs that's wearing a cape, a studded headband and who sings beautifully into a fucking tibia. Or at least I think that's a tibia, but you know, I ain't no doctor, so what do I know about anything that isn't hot beat related. This shit is like the metal equivalent of Jan Terri, only with slightly higher production values and better hair. It's incredible and also quite riveting, and I would like to thank Vortex for Opening the Gate in the name of metal, with metal. If they didn't do it, who would? 

Friday, October 22, 2010

Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party!: All Treat Edition!

trickortreatfastway

Man, am I feeling really down tonight…all the kids at school are nothing but yuppie jerk offs, and because of that dumb jock, Tim Hainy, I got chocolate milk all over my best maroon and white baseball tee. To make things worse, thanks to those idiot football losers, half the girls in the school almost saw my skin-flute and my full - and incredibly white - naked ass today. But the cherry on top of this shit sundae has got to be the greatest rock sta…no, scratch that, the greatest musician of all time, as well as my idol and object of affection, Sammi Curr, died in a fire today. Man, this sucks sooo bad! Sammi was the only person that understood me. He was the only one that could make all of this better.

There is one good thing that came out of today's many un-radical events, and thanks to my buddy, DJ Nuke, I now have in my possession the only existing copy of Sammi Curr's last recording. If anything can lift me out of this funk, it's the sounds of Sammi's voice. He understands where I'm coming from, he knows who I really am deep inside, and together, we can take down all of those stupid jocks. It's just you and me, Sammi, in my bedroom, all alone, and together we will rock this party all night long!!  It's like you always said, Sammi…rock's chosen warriors will rule the apocalypse, so let's rock.

Trick or Treat is the title track for the 1986 horror-METAL!! METAL!!!! classic (well, maybe not classic…), Trick or Treat. The entire soundtrack was performed by British heavy metal band, Fastway, who would later release the Trick or Treat OST as their fourth studio album. The music is decent for what it is, I mean, it's certainly dated, but it does capture a time in my life that I will always look back on fondly.

Trick or Treat is a shit fart of a film, but it's super fun and the level of entertainment that is reached with how bad it can be at times is what makes the movie a rewarding watch. However, I do enjoy Trick or Treat a little more than I should for how it does really bring me back to a time of being a rebellious youth who was constantly listening to Heavy METAL!! in my badass basement bedroom covered in Megadeth and Anthrax posters. This was a time when I would sit through 3 hours of The Ball waiting for a decent video. A time when I would pretend my GI Joe Cobra Raven was a guitar, a guitar I rocked like a motha fucka!!! I seriously did. Nevertheless, my love for METAL!!  never resulted in me staring longingly at any male lead singer of any band. Well, maybe Lemmy, but he's like just so dreamy, how could I not?

Friday, November 27, 2009

Freddy's Friday Night Dance Party!: Motör(Pin)head Edition!!!

Yo-yo-hoes! Didn't do a dance party last week and I can't even remember why now...actually, come to think of it, I was just being lazy. Anypooh, I got a dope ass track for you turkey stuffed sassy pants tonight and I think a lot of you are really gonna dig this one. The song: Hellraiser! The band: Motörhead!!

A couple of quaaludes and a half hours time, and I too, will put a spell on you...



Did you feel that thundering heat?! Well, I did, but the heat I felt is from when I went pee during the guitar solo...thanks, Lemmy. There are very few things scarier than a cenobite, but Lemmy from Motörhead comes pretty damned close. Written by Ozzy Osbourne, Zakk Wylde, and the moley one himself, Lemmy, Hellraiser was previously recorded by Ozzy in '91 for his No More Tears album. Motörhead went on to record the song and it famously showed up on the OST for 1992's Anthony Hickox directed, Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth.

Hellraiser and this post in general, bring me back big time. I love this song and the video is a welcome blast from the metal past too. I know for a fact that I have a VHS tape with this video on it as I used to recorded all the dope shit from Headbanger's Ball, and Hellraiser was one of my favs. You can't beat Lemmy playing poker against Pinhead, especially when you know Pinhead ain't got no chance...in HELL! And it may not be the best of the series, but I can't help but love every bit of 90's sweat that Hell on Earth drips. Great video for a great song!

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