Chuck Norris Ate My Baby: Sara Paxton

Chuck Norris Ate My Baby

Showing posts with label Sara Paxton. Show all posts

Showing posts with label Sara Paxton. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

The Last House on the Left 2009: Rebuilt With Different Tools

*Spoiler Warning* If you aren't familiar with the story of The Last House on the Left, then there are spoilers in this review. However...

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What you love about me?

Matt-suzaka: Born from the hottest fires of Hades, Matt-suzaka was raised by demons with the sole purpose of exacting revenge on those who wronged his family. However, after a stubbed toe and a lost battle for supremacy with the great witch Oprah, Matt-suzaka's been forced to settle for watching and writing about genre cinema. Trading in his black dragon sword of vengeance for a black keyboard of Dell, Matt now spends his darkened days writing reviews and analytical pieces for genre films, both long and short, for Chuck Norris Ate My Baby. May you never cross his path, for his path is that of fire and brimstone.

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