Chuck Norris Ate My Baby: Children of the Corn

Chuck Norris Ate My Baby

Showing posts with label Children of the Corn. Show all posts

Showing posts with label Children of the Corn. Show all posts

Friday, December 7, 2012

Dear Santa: by Malachai Boardman

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What you love about me?

Matt-suzaka: Born from the hottest fires of Hades, Matt-suzaka was raised by demons with the sole purpose of exacting revenge on those who wronged his family. However, after a stubbed toe and a lost battle for supremacy with the great witch Oprah, Matt-suzaka's been forced to settle for watching and writing about genre cinema. Trading in his black dragon sword of vengeance for a black keyboard of Dell, Matt now spends his darkened days writing reviews and analytical pieces for genre films, both long and short, for Chuck Norris Ate My Baby. May you never cross his path, for his path is that of fire and brimstone.

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