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Sunday, January 10, 2010

The Horror Hangover

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As if being half in the bag isn’t a good enough excuse to stay in today, it is frackin’ cold out pretty much everywhere, which is all the more reason to stay in, snuggle up right next to me, and let me guide you through the great things that are on television today. Okay, maybe great is stretching it a bit, but at least good…kinda. I have a pretty solid and interesting Horror Hangover to get you through the agony of alcohol poisoning this Sunday afternoon, so wipe the crust from yer eyes…it’s time to begin.

Starting off at 10:00 AM The Skulls (2000) is on AMC. I saw bits and pieces of this movie and it is pretty terrible, but movies like this always seem to keep me entertained in a guilty pleasure type of way. Perfect to watch whilst hanging mad hard, The Skulls is like a Full Moon movie with a budget and a few stars. The Skulls! What a name!

Also at 10:00 SyFy kicks The Skulls in The Balls with Dark Breed (1996). You know, I said that The Skulls would be adequate Hangover material, but after seeing the trailer for Dark Breed, there is only one way to go! I think this may be my pick of the week – you can’t beat 90’s Sci Fi cheese, melted on a warm piece of gore-met bread!

12:00 noon and SyFy is still going strong with Living Hell (2008). I actually have seen this movie available on Netflix instant watch a million times (that’s a lot!), but under the title Organizm. I just shrugged it off, but it does actually look kind of fun in a B-Movie way. It stars that dude that ate cum off his hand in The Doom Generation and also played the killer in the fantastic remake of Prom Night.      

At 2:00, SyFy is continuing to bring the pain with Heatstroke (2008)…and when I say bring the pain, I mean it. This pic from the film should say it all.Heatstroke-AliensMay the lord bless you SyFy, for you are truly the greatest thing ever created. 

Speaking of the greatest, at 3:00 Death Wish V: The Face of Death (1994) is playing on ION. When I said earlier that Dark Breed may be my pick of the week, I knew that it wasn’t the only one, because I knew that a Death Wish movie was on. I’m so sneaky! Even older than shit, Bronson will knock yo ass out and I love it!

Ending the Hangover with a bang, at 4:00 The Golden Child (1986) is on Comedy Central. I love and have seen The Golden Child a ton of times. It’s Eddie Murphy, when he was funny, in a horror movie - and not just a horror movie, but an occult horror movie! It’s funny, it’s totally ridiculous, and “I want the knife…Pleeeeease!” Is still funny as shit. My sweet brother Numpsay, I love this movie!

That’ll do her for today baby eaters…I hope you found some positive guidance this Sunday and Go Patriots!

12 comments:

  1. Dark Breed is one of my biggest guilty pleasures ever! I just can't get enough of it :D Death Wish 5 is good too!

    And now I have to find Living Hell, looks like a fine movie to me.

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  2. Matt, thanks for all of the recommendations, they sound like classics! And thanks, also, for the invitation to watch these gems with you. Now, pass the Fritos and Dr. Pepper.

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  3. think i did witness THE SKulls, was too gone still to remember how much i liked it. i think.

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  4. Thank god you were being sarcastic about the Prom Night remake. We were going to have words.

    Heatstroke looks ridiculous. I've never seen Dark Breed. Will definitely check it out.

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  5. Ahhh so The Skulls wasn't a bad dream I had one time? It IS a real movie?

    I'm glad Cortez caught the sarcasm with the Prom Night remake because I missed it. I was like wtf?!!

    I haven't seen Golden Child in a long time, but I do enjoy it. It was ages ago when Eddie Murphy was actually funny.

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  6. Yikes.. going to be sticking with the ol DVD collection today it looks like!

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  7. Ninja: I love all the Death Wish movies too! Dark Breed does look like a whole lot of cheesy fun...I am gonna have to seek it out sometime!

    Pax: There truly is some classic cinema gracing the small screen today! And don't be gettin' crumbs on my couch son!

    Jason: Ha ha! There isn't much to like about The Skulls, but it screams guilty pleasure.

    POT: After Dark Breed and Living Hell, I got all burnt out by time I got to Heatstroke, so I just posted a pic!

    I knew my sarcasm would not shine through about Prom Night...that movie blows more than a fan!

    Geof: The Skulls is a real movie and you are caught up in the web of secrecy, lies, and cover ups!

    I haven't seen Golden Child in a long time either, but I watched it all the time when I was a kid. Murphy was so funny back then...I miss that.

    Carl: Ha ha! No Heatstroke for you?! It's a mixture of Sci Fi AND horror!

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  8. So true! I love the snake/serpent lady!

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  9. So I got Train on DVD for free. It's either that on some SyFy original....I just like how you made A Doom Generation reference Matt. Kudos.

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  10. I love The Doom Generation, but I will always think of that scene when I see Johnathon Schaech! I never heard of Train, but checked out the trailer and it looked okay enough...very torture porn looking.

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  11. The Golden Child for the win! It was the only one I was home in time for. I suffered through The Skulls long ago vowing to never again to put salt on that wound and the other movies mentioned do seem pretty cool. I constantly have to be reminded of the huge market for B for TV science-fiction there is.

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